dips and turns

we all go through little dips and turns. sometimes the dips are short. sometimes they are long. sometimes they are incredibly painful, other times they can feel like a dull pain that doesn’t seem to go away. and you just push through. i’m trying to recover from a dip. a dip of disappointment with baby stuff, a wave of hormones from the progesterone i’ve been taking, and a serious dip from fighting off a handful of sicknesses that seem to keep barging into our home. its hard to think clearly when you are sick. and enough already.

and then i think of japan. what kind of dip are they going through? unbelievable.

i don’t think the size of our dip matters. in this sense: each one moves the heart of God. each one counts for something. each one matters. and i think that God is using the dips to do something transformative in us. no matter how big or small.

i’m gonna bring out a lot of verses today. because when i feel off, it really is the only thing that makes sense to me.

i often say that hope is something that i can’t do with out. i feel like i could push through anything if i had hope in something. and then i remember that its also easy to lose hope. and that hope isn’t something you can fake. it has to be spoken into you. i believe God can call into being things that do not exist. even things like hope.

romans 4:17

even God, who gives life to the dead, and calls into being that which did does not exist.

i’m pretty big on remembering. thats one of the major reasons why i started this blog. i forget pretty easily….and i don’t think i’m alone in that. i started journaling a long time ago. and i go back and read over things. so when the time comes that i can’t seem to hear God, i go back and read through journals entries that for whatever reason, seem to be full of answers from God. times when i seriously could not put my pen down. i kept writing and writing- knowing that something deeper than my human heart was compelling me to do so. yesterday, i went through old journal entries and found these verses i had written out.

lamentations

3:20

surely my soul remembers, and my souls is bowed down within me. this i recall to my mind.

therefore i have hope.

for his compassions never fail. they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.

the Lord is my portion, says my soul. therefore i have hope in him. the Lord is good to those who wait for him.

its when i read things like this, i feel my spirit lift a little. i remember that there is something about waiting on God that is transformative for us. and how sometimes dips are necessary to have authentic hope in something bigger than yourself.

romans 5:1-5

by entering through faith into what God has always wanted to do for us- set us right with him, make us fit for him- we have it all together with God because of Jesus. and that’s not all: we throw open our doors to God and discover at the same moment that he has already thrown open his door for us. we find ourselves standing where we always hoped we might stand. -out in the wide open spaces of God’s grace and glory, standing tall and shouting praise. (the message)

and not only this, but we can take joy in tribulation, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance, and perseverance, proven character, and character, hope. and hope does not disappoint. because the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit that he has given to us. (nasb)

so my response is to wait and believe. and to remind myself that for a long time, i’ve been praying that God would -like romans  15:13 says – fill me with all joy and peace in believing, that i would abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit inside of me.

if dips produce that kind of hope, than maybe i’m okay with dips. ben and i have big dreams. we want God to make the wrong things around us right. and we want him to use our family in the process. that kind of stuff requires a different kind of hope than what i have. and if the dips in our lives are speaking hope into us, than we say we’ll take it.

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