ben and i decided to stop taking the fertility medicine that i have been on for the last year. we’ve relinquished our dream of baby #2 into the hands of a good Father who knows how and when to create life.
it still hurts.
but we feel like we hear God telling us to rest a while. to give it over.
and we have.
and i know that God is our Father and he knows our desires. and he knows how to give good gifts. he is the author of abundance. and the author of good.
i believe that. i have a living hope. i have a living breathing hope. and that hope is
and even typing out his name brings me peace and the awareness that i belong to him and he is in me and covers me. and when i’m afraid or when i’m grieving i can feel him wrap around me like a blanket.
and He is redeeming me. and changing me. and reframing my heart around the things that matter to Him.
i haven’t been redeemed with things that fade. thank God. i haven’t been redeemed with money or clothing, or anything else that fades in time.
but i have been protected and redeemed by something eternal. that doesn’t fade in time. something that holds me. something greater than our temporary world and our fleeting lives here.
i’ve been redeemed by the Author of life.
a living, breathing hope.
he holds my future. and for that ben and i can have peace. a deep, steady peace. the kind that allows us to hand over our battle and actually live out a real hope.
grace and peace be yours in abundance.
in his great mercy he has given us a new birth into a living hope, into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade.
and though you haven’t seen him, you love him, and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy.
so live your lives as strangers here,
for you know that it was not with perishable things such as silver or gold that you were redeemed from the empty way of life handed down to you from your forefathers, but with the precious blood of christ, a lamb without blemish or defect.
through him you believe in God, who raised him from the dead and glorified him, and so your faith and hope are in God.
all men are like grass, and all their glory is like the flowers of the field;
the grass withers and the flowers fall…
but the word of the LORD stands forever.