emri’s prayer

i wish you could hear my sweet 3 year old’s voice tonight as she prayed.

she asked me if she could pray tonight as i was tucking her in.

“dear Jesus.

help us pray

and help us believe.

and please give us a new house.”

this has been a difficult month for ben and i as we have decided to stop the process of trying to get pregnant.

my faith has taken a hit.

and so my prayers have been,

“help me believe.”

and i’ve been singing a song to her as she goes to bed called “help me believe.”

and i’m so moved that my words have made their way into her prayers.

and it is the most sweetest thing to hear

“help me believe”

come out of her little mouth. because i know that she will be praying those words for a life time.

and that He will be faithful to those prayers for the rest her life.

***

here is the song i’ve been singing to her

take me back, to the time when i was maybe 8 or 9…

and i believed.

when Jesus walked on waters blue, and if he helped me i could too…

if i believe.

before rational, analysis, and systematic thinking robbed me of a sweet simplicity.

when wonders and what mysteries were far less off than silly dreams and child hood fantasy

help me believe cause i don’t want to miss any miracles. maybe i’d see much better by closing my eyes.

so i would, shed this grown up skin, i’m in

to touch an angel’s wing. and i would be free.

help me believe.

~nichole nordeman

5 thoughts on “emri’s prayer

  1. You are an amazing woman and mama. I miss you and Emri! I know Evy does too. I hope and pray that the Lord would bless you with another sweet pea. I know those words may ring hollow in a heart that is longing so deeply for a baby and I am so sorry for your pain through it all, Kerri. Just know you are smack in the middle of his will. I think you are a beautiful follower of our Lord. Thank you for blessing me with your posts. miss you and love you…. ally

  2. I love Nichole Nordeman! I’ll join that prayer (for help in the believing and for a babe) and I am grateful to you for your vulnerability and openness about these things. Love you!

  3. We need that prayer in the ballew house as well. Let us believe. It seems that we have to grow in faith to believe in prayer and then when that prayer is not answered the way we would like yet we continue to choose faith…thats when the real growth spurt begins to take place. But it hurts. A lot…growing pains. So we will take some belief over here too. Love u and that sweet little emri. (and ben too). And now I will be looking up that song asap.

  4. I know exactly how you feel, as I once walked the road you are on now (praying & trying for a baby). We actively tried for 6 years with many treatments. I know the questions, the heartache, the doubt. I hope God will grant you your desire, and soon, dear Kerri. I will pray on your behalf. Joy is coming. Hug that sweet little Emri and see God’s goodness reflected in her little face. Blessings to you –Celina (from Midway in SD)

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